straight bummin'
Now kudos to those individuals that haven't felt this before; you've found your cure, you've found the solution that works for you, and you've successfully avoided this incredibly annoying feeling. Usually feelings of remorse, guilt, jealousy, sadness, or anger are easily fixed because you can trace to the direct source. But, when you're "straight bummin'" that source is untraceable, which then makes it hard to resolve.
This particular feeling could derive from anything: the monotonous daily routine I follow for work and school, or that I'm part of the small group of girls that discovered a mission isn't in their predetermined plan, or that more than 75% of the people in my age group are gone, or that I'm at a point in my life where huge decisions are being made on the daily - i do. not. know. It's incredibly frustrating and gets old pretty dang quick. I hope somebody can vouch for this because it drives me nuts! These feelings bring you down and limit simple motives like hope, determination, and thrill from happening. They limit you from freaking enjoy this amazing life that we've been so blessed to receive. Ha as you can tell, I really really despise this "straight bummin" thing.
Now this post isn't meant for you to build a self-pitying novel about your life (we all have those once in a while, but they're honestly always ineffective and never helpful). This post is to ultimately change this lame stage that we all go through. Because I found my solution, I know that anybody can find theirs. In these past few weeks, and through many different experiences, I think I've finally discovered the secret to finding the cure. So I'm here to help those of you (trek on!! :) ) that are still in that rut and have a deep desire to get out.
I've always believed that a genuine, caring listener is the cure to anything; a person who truly has your best interest at heart can make any problem go away (along with a long vacation to Lake Powell :) ). Being surrounded by people who desire your personal happiness can never disappoint. My awesome, incredibly genuine, intelligent listener dad is one of these people in my life. I've been blessed with somebody that knows how I'm feeling even when I haven't said a word. My dad knew I was "bummin'". So as he cautiously attempted to enter the complicated young-adult female mind, I could already feel his genuine concern and readied advice. He patiently sat and listened to my confusing, indistinct explanation about how I was feeling unsure, uneasy, and unknowing about just about everything in my life. Then, with such humility and grace, asked...
"Kate, what in life, makes you content?"
Now not only am I the most indecisive person in the world, but I'm also horrible at giving direct, firm answers. I had no idea the answer to that simple question. Who knew that such a straight forward question could be the answer to such an indistinct concept? This isn't an easy question to answer so I don't expect you to know right away, but seriously consider and think about it. This is the cure. This can change your "straight bummin'" days into "straight livin'" days. So when you're feeling lost or insignificant or unsure, take your time and focus on this idea.
"This is a simple but critical lesson to learn. When stress levels rise, when distress appears, when tragedy strikes, too often we attempt to keep up with the same frantic pace or even accelerate, thinking somehow that the more rushed our pace, the better off we will be. If life and its rushed pace and many stresses have made it difficult for you to feel like rejoicing, then perhaps now is a good time to refocus on what matters most." - President Uchtdorf
You've got to discover what brings satisfaction to your life and the "what's" and "why's" to your daily actions. Ultimately, you've got to find what your purpose is. Why do you go to work and school? Why does your path not lead to a mission? What are you doing with your life while everybody is gone? Why are you deciding on those certain life-altering choices?
"They who have no central purpose in their life fall an easy prey to petty worries, fears, troubled, and self-pityings, all of which are indications of weakness, which lead, just as surely as deliberately planned sins, to failure, unhappiness, and loss, for weakness cannot persist in a power-evolving universe. "
Now not everybody is going to agree on one universal cure. Not everybody's solution is going to be the same because it's based on such a personal level. But I'm telling you mine so you can find yours.
As I've pondered this thought for the past couple of weeks, I've discovered that what makes me content is pretty simple-it's seeing others content. Nothing brings me more satisfaction than seeing the people I love happy. Because this brings me so much genuine joy, I know that this is my purpose in this life! As cheesy and yet, obvious, as it sounds, the path that we are supposed to be on is supposed to bring us the most joy. So, making others happy makes me most happy. I realized that I live to make sure people are content. So even when I'm "bummin" or distraught or upset, my motivation comes from my desire to brings others up. I want to be happy so I can make others happy.
One of my good friends nanny's a family that loss their mother recently. In Relief Society a couple weeks ago she stated,
"Some days I just feel down and want to sit around and mope about my own life and I don't have any motivation to be happy or positive. But then I go to my job and see these adorable kids and see how they've lost their mom and I realize that they need someone to be that light. They need someone to be happy for them and be that example during this hard loss."
So on those days that I can't be content for myself, I'm going to make an effort to be happy for the people around me. I want to emulate the light that I am given everyday through Christ. I want to live in a hopeful, positive way so that I can have The Spirit to guide me on how I can help others be happy. This is my goal and this is what I work towards and focus on everyday. I go to work and school because I love the relationships I have with people there, I chose to be content with not serving a mission because I value the predetermined plan and love my Father in Heaven who created it for me, I'm staying here to grow individually so I can be my best self to serve everybody when they get home, and I'm living according to my goals so I can make the right life-changing decisions. Because I remember and focus on my purpose, those bummin' days cease.
So discover what makes you content and satisfied with your days. Happiness is so important-if not the most important-in this life. Think, decide and act with purpose. If you can't find it right away, start putting yourself out there. Try new things-there's an infinite amount of options. Make goals and work towards something. Don't let that bummin' come back!
"Those who are not prepared for the apprehension of a great purpose, should fix the thoughts upon the faultless performance of their duty, no matter how insignificant their task may appear."
love you all of course! this one is dedicated to you lovely ladies!
love,
moss
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